Sarah East examines famous celebrity apologies, including Mel Gibson, Michael Richards, Isaiah Washington, Alec Baldwin. See more celebrity gossip at popcrunch.com
June 30, 2010
Some dickings
What is with all of the dickings lately? I mean, everywhere you go there’s a dicking. Do you get it? Cause I sure don’t. Why can’t people just decide to not dick eachother all of the time? It’s really a shame.
The other day I was walking to the bank on the corner and a homeless guy just came up and tried to dick me. Luckily, I was wearing a suit of armor at the time so his dick didn’t penetrate me as he intended, but hell. A man can’t even walk to the corner without getting dicked by homeless homos any more.. sad day!
Report: Tiger Woods Divorce Final, Elin Woods to Receive Record $750M Settlement
MSNBC, Fox News and the UK’s Sun are reporting that the Tiger Woods-Elin Nordegren divorce is final, with only a filing in Orlando County Court remaining.
“Everything’s signed. Elin is ready to file for divorce at Orlando County Court,” says an inside source. “She expects to sometime in the next seven days.”
The settlement Elin is to receive, which has become the subject of much debate in recent weeks, is reportedly valued in the neighborhood of $750 million.
Yes, three-quarters of a billion dollars, believed to be the biggest payout of a celebrity divorce ever. There are conditions, however, according to reports:
- Tiger may not bring any other females around their children.
- Elin can never publicly speak about his various mistresses.
- Elin gets full custody of the kids but they share legal custody.
That means Tiger will share decisions about the kids, and as such, Elin will not be able to permanently relocate them to her native Sweden anytime soon.
Tiger’s main caveat, though, was that she shut yer yap – for all eternity.
A pal said: “Tiger’s main fear is her telling her story after he’s rebuilt his reputation, sending him back to the gutter. The price of that sum is her silence.”
“Complete confidentiality. No interviews, tell-all books, or TV appearances about this for the rest of her life – even if Tiger dies first – or she’ll lose the lot.”
Basically, Rachel Uchitel, Jaimee Grubbs, Joslyn James, Devon James and the dozen other hoes we know of ended up costing Tiger about $37.5 million per.
One report suggests that Elin Woods ended up with double the sum she sought after her lawyers determined Tiger is worth much more than $1 billion.
Her friend explained: “Elin’s legal team have done a great job digging up all sorts of assets.” We would have to say that’s the case if the sum is correct.
While it should be noted that The Sun is a British tabloid, the $750 million figure has been reported by more than one source over the past few weeks.
Let’s just say we wouldn’t bet the under on $500 million anyway.
Eclipse Breaks Box Office Record for Midnight Showings
Eclipse is the best Twilight Saga film to date.
Perhaps this helped the movie set a box office record early this morning, but we have a feeling it would have done quite well even without THG’s glowing review.
The third film in this franchise broke the second film’s record haul for midnight showings today, as Eclipse pulled in a whopping $30 million across 4,416 screens nationwide. That figure also marks the widest release of all-time, bumping Iron Man 2 down a notch.
New Moon grossed close to $300 domestically during its run, while the original Twlight topped out at $193 million. Expect Eclipse to sky-rocket past both those numbers.
Just how huge has the Twilight Saga become?
In an incident both depressing and hilarious, Elena Kagan was asked about it during her Supreme Court confirmation hearings today. As you can see below, she refrained from commenting on her affiliation with Team Jacob or Team Edward.
Joran van der Sloot Indicted on Charges of Wire Fraud & Extortion
Joran van der Sloot was indicted on charges connected to the Natalee Holloway case by a federal grand jury in Alabama on Wednesday. CNN reports that van der Sloot has been indicted in connection with allegations that he attempted to extort $250,000 from Holloway’s mother, allegedly in exchange for information about the location of the missing woman’s remains. Van der Sloot is currently in police custody in Peru, where he faces murder charges in the death of Stephany Flores.
Read full story on The Insider
Read full story on The Insider
Kim Kardashian Visits NYC for Wax Figure Unveiling
Making her way out east, Kim Kardashian was spotted arriving into JFK Airport in New York City on Wednesday (June 30).
Joined by her supportive mother, Kris Jenner, the two lovely ladies headed out of the terminal to an awaiting car – as they made the trip so that Kim can unveil her wax figure at the famed Madame Tussauds in Times Square on Thursday, July 1.
Quite excited about the event, Miss Kardashian told an awaiting paparazzo, “I can’t wait to see what ‘Kim’ looks like!”
During the airport exit, photogs also brought up Kim’s rumored relationship with Dallas Cowboys receiver Miles Austin.
Playing coy, the E! reality stars pretended to be on their cell phones, with Kris smilingly saying, ‘”I don’t know who you’re talking about.”
On a side note, Kim, Kourtney, Khloe and Kris were recently in Las Vegas to announce plans for a new boutique in The Mirage Hotel and Casino called Khaos.
Featuring exclusive and family endorsed products, the shop is set to open later this summer, with Kim saying, “All of us will be here Khaos all the time.”
‘The Insider”s Tell-All with the Woman Claiming to Be Jake Pavelka’s Ex
“The Insider” talks to Tanya Douglas, Jake Pavelka‘s alleged ex-girlfriend, about her upcoming Star magazine tell-all about the former “Bachelor,” who has so famously broken up with his fianc?e Vienna Girardi. “I think Jake and Vienna broke up because there is no room for anyone else in his life but himself,” Tanya says. “I think he is completely involved with himself. I think he is completely involved with furthering his career as an actor. I think that he led Vienna on, along with everyone else, saying that flying was his passion and aviation is what he wants to do. I think he is finished being a pilot and I think that he wants to be an actor now. I think that the attention that he gets from his supposed fans makes him feel fulfilled like no one else could make him feel.” Tanya, who claims that she and Jake dated exclusively for five months, tells “The Insider” that the deal breaker for her in ending their relationship was “the realization of being completely used.” She goes on to say, “He used me to have someone that cared about him in his life, someone that would support him in anything. …We had a lot of fun together and then, as soon I was an inconvenience for him and his television plans, he just decided that it was best to just drop me for the time being. I am not a girl to be dropped. I am not a girl to sit in the shadow, and I am damn sure not a girl to be lied to. And, you know, I just eventually got tired of the lies and I got tired of being conned.” Tanya tells “The Insider” that Jake did try to contact her after “The Bachelor” was over and he had proposed to Vienna. “When Jake contacted me after the show wrapped up filming, he let me know that there were so many things he wanted to tell me,” she says. “He said that there were so many things he wanted to tell me but now was just not the time. And he couldn’t tell me at that time. But he said that ever since he first saw me and we first met me that he never loved anyone more.” For more of Tanya’s interview, watch “The Insider” tonight. Then come back tomorrow for the second part of the tell-all before Tanya’s Star magazine story is on newsstands on Friday. You can see more of Tanya’s personal photos at tanyaldouglas.com.
Read full story on The Insider
Read full story on The Insider
Denise Richards Lands Sultry New TV Role
She’s been flying under the radar as of late, but Denise Richards is back and heading to Spike TV.
The 39-year-old actress is set to join the cast of the football comedy called “Blue Mountain State” in a recurring role as woman named Debra.
Co-star Darin Brooks told Us magazine, “She plays the coach’s ex-wife, and I think I sleep with her!”
Continuing on, Brooks added, “Everyone said she was really cool, really nice, it was great to work with her. I’m really looking forward to sleeping with her!”
‘The Bachelorette’ Reacts to Jake and Vienna’s Bitter Split
She vied for Jake Pavelka‘s affections on “The Bachelor” but was ultimately denied — now, “Bachelorette” Ali Fedotowsky is offering her take on Jake and Vienna Girardi‘s breakup! “It’s sad the split happened,” Ali tells People.com. “I hope the media stuff dies down and they can focus on moving forward.” “I want to make sure he has time to heal and go through all of the emotions before I would even consider reaching out as a friend,” she adds. But now that Jake’s an eligible “bachelor” again, does Ali have any interest in trying to get involved with him romantically? “That’s not going to happen,” she tells the site. “I hate to put a damper on everyone’s hopes out there, but no.”
Read full story on The Insider
Read full story on The Insider
The Dream: Being Rich Makes Fatherhood Easier
Enjoying his wealth to the fullest after having been through his share of struggles, The Dream credits his solid cash flow with easing the struggles of fatherhood.
Having welcomed his first child with Christina Milian four months back (he has 3 children with former wife Nivea), the 28-year-old music industry success story tells People magazine of raising daughter Violet Madison, “This time’s easier because I’m rich now.”
Explaining further, The Dream adds, “When I had my 5-year-old, I was up all night and paying for milk with the last couple of cents I had, so it’s a little easier now.”
Also telling of his singer wife’s fondness of their little bundle of joy, he dishes, “Christina’s very attached. She doesn’t let anybody near that baby. Not even me sometimes!”
